Criminals Caught in the Act

Despite the “butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth expression” Bristol based builder Geddie H is once again making news for all the wrong reasons. After being caught out trying to swap his newly born daughter for a large plastic gorilla in a Spiderman outfit back in August 2011, the crazy construction boss is now suspected of having carried out two new offences. According to unconfirmed reports, the dodgy dad supposedly tried to suffocate the same daughter involved in the plastic gorilla in a Spiderman outfit swap deal (whose name has been with-held for legal reason) and, additionally, encouraged a minor to participate in a criminal act. The minor in question goes under the moniker of “Honey B” and is non-other than the eldest daughter of the barmy builder. Police are said to be monitoring the situation but claim they are unable to act until “a clear chargeable offence has been committed and/or reported”.
As has often been said, a picture says more than a thousand words and world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog has acquired photographic proof to back up the recent accusations. Not only does our photograph show the moment in which the alleged attempted suffocation took place but it also clearly shows the evil glint in the eyes of Honey B who seems well aware of her father’s wicked intention. Once again unsuspecting Mum Raggs H is nowhere to be seen.
Hopefully, this is all the evidence that the police need in order to arrest this cowardly criminal and lock him up for a long, long time. With a bit of luck, there’s still time to save Honey B from choosing a life of crime and cruelty at such a tender age.

Ain't Snow Stopping Us Now!

Bristol sisters Isla and Amelie won’t let the weather get them down. The sporty twins, who celebrate their birthday today are fighting for the chance to represent their country at bobsleigh at the next Winter Olympics with the help of big sister coach Maya Eve of Destruction. Whilst their plans have been thwarted somewhat by a lack of snow, as our picture shows, they still are going full steam ahead with their training program.
Word famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog wishes them many happy safe turns…..er…returns.
Go get em girls!

Enter the Dragon - Killa Kisses

Birthday boy Josh W. a Sports Therapy and Rehabilitation major in the Bristol area successfully defended his World Snogathon title last week in a bout which was specially arranged to herald in the Chinese New Year 2012 - The Year of the Dragon. In this exciting new sport, the opponents have to kiss each other as many times as possible in three 3 minute rounds. Contestants must wear gloves as there is a strictly no groping policy. Points are scored in the following manner: on the cheek - 1pt, on the lips - 2pts, on the mouth with tongue - 3pts.
Josh grappled his way to an easy victory but was unable to comment after the bout as his opponent had bitten his tongue to pieces. However, according to an official Snogathon after bout translator Josh said *ai wan a edicate is ictorty uooo mai mudda*

Our world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog photographer was on hand to record the momentous occasion. The picture above shows Josh moving in for the kill with one of his top moves, the well rehearsed Casanova Cuddle.

Gong Xi Fa Ca! - Year of the Dragon

World famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog would like to wish its reader(s) an absolutely spiffing start to the Chinese New Year celebrations. The traditional 15 days of fun and merriment kick off today with the new moon and end with the full moon on February 7th.

Enjoy!

BREAKING NEWS EDITION

Reports are coming through that a Bristol housewife operating under the alias of Countess 10,000 has been disqualified from the recently finalised 10,000th hit competition run by world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog. Apparently the disgraced mother-of-two was disqualified on two accounts. Firstly the despicable person hogged the comments page writing groups of up to 10 comments at a time. Secondly she hired a man known only as “Andres” to fly Chile (South America) with a packet of 160 Tetley tea bags in an attempt to bribe judges into turning a blind eye to her un-sports man woman or Child like behaviour. According to a "very reliable source", the tea bags were dumped unceremoniously on the doorstep of the world famous blogspot’s headquarters along with two miniature chocolate Father Christmases, a tiny woollen Christmas Prairie Rat (!!!!!) and a bribery note (duh!).
MORE STARTLING DETAILS ON PAGE 2, 4 & 5
Page 6: MY MOTHER’S A POWER CRAZED DICTATOR by ROBIN A.
Page 7: LOLA M. EXCLUSIVE: MY NIGHTS OF HELL WITH A POWER CRAZED DICTATOR
Page 8: HEALTH SPECIAL: THE MAGICAL BENEFITS OF EATING SAUSAGES & BLACK PUDDING
Page 9: MY PARTNER NEGLECTED HER FAMILY (Shocking interview with Count 10,000)
Page 10: MY TWIN SHOULD BE LOCKED UP By QUEEN OF SPADES
Page 13: SISTER OF SHAME: A FAMILY SPEAKS OUT
Page 14: DIET: 10 SAUCY SAUSAGE & BLACK PUDDING RECIPES
Page 15 – 73: SPORT’S NEWS

Art for Art's Sake:LightseekerZ

World famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog is proud to present a world premiere of gynormous proportions with the first public showing of a major new work by Santiago based experimental artist Experiment SH1310. LightseekerZ is a visual feast for the eyes which is loosely connected with various art forms such as computer art, digital art and digital painting. The new piece breaks the mould of the aforementioned digital art movements because it is accompanied by a soundtrack and has been heavily edited. However, according to the artist, the inclusion of a soundtrack is due to the medium of exhibition being used. “Under normal conditions the piece would be played on a continuous loop with only the original audio from the “live” recording which, apart from video editing processes, remains untreated. This in itself breaks some of the rules of other digital art forms as they increasingly tend to be silent footage. However, my way of working often involves layers of ambient sound such as those found at the beginning of the piece being presented here. Given the fact that this version of LightseekerZ is being exhibited on an online platform I thought it only fitting that it should be accompanied by an appropriate soundtrack. “ This exclusive premiere is part of world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog’s 10,000th hit celebrations which, although being carefully prepared to coincide with the start of the Chinese Year of the Dragon which begins on January 23rd, is likely to occur in the next few days, thus jumping the gun by approximately one week. The soundtrack is an original creation featuring cult Paekakariki based songstress Hetty Hope who is one half of legendary New Zealand based duo Dovetails.



Editor's note: Due to page width restrictions the video is not viewable in its full glory. Please paste: http://www.youtube.com/embed/AQsVEl6k7qQ into a new tab, turm up the volume, switch off the lights and enjoy.

Secret Prize Diasppears!

Police are treating the disappearance of world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog’s 10,000th hit secret prize as highly suspicious. A police spokesperson has gone on record as having said “the disappearance of world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog’s 10,000th hit secret prize is highly suspicious.”
Apparently, police plans for a massive hunt have gone awry because they have no idea what they are looking for. The secret prize, which was only announced recently, was actually so secret that nobody had actually heard of it (prior to a recent posting on the world famous blogspot), or knows what it is. This seems to be the main reason why police are treating the disappearance as suspicious. A high ranking police official who refused to be named stated that “the disappearance of a item of this nature obviously arouses our suspicion and although we’ll do our best to recover the item before the up and coming award date this task is hindered by the fact that we have no idea what we’re looking for.”
Whilst rumors of a reward appear to be unfounded, police are appealing to the public for assistance in recovering the prize. Staff at world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog were unavailable for comment with all personal associated with the world famous blogspot remaining tight-lipped.

10,000

As the big day approaches, the reader (s) of world famous blogspot Papasgotabrandnewblog wait bated breath to discover who will win the secret prize for the 10,000th Papasgotabrandnewblog page hit. The prize is, in fact, so secret that nobody has actually heard of it, knows what it is, or who, for that matter, will be awarding it. Is it fact, fiction, rumour or just plain gossip? Nobody knows for sure, however, everybody knows that only one person will see the big hit number 10,000: The visitor before will get 9999, the visitor after 10,001. Furthermore, what will happen to the 4 digit counter? Will it miraculously grow a fifth digit or will it revert back to 0001.
Watch this space: All will be revealed.

Bowie Birthday Boy

Dave's having a big bash at his place. He's invited us all over. Try to arrive before 9pm or there won't be any parking space.
Ps. Bring booze and something to nibble.

Hats Off 4 Hetty

World famous blogspot pasgotabrandnewblog has decided to be doubly devious during 2012. Today’s post will push the majority of its readers into future time-space by sending out birthday greetings to Hetty Hope, lead singer with down-under psychedelic folk duo Dovetails, on the day of her birthday according to the NZ time zone without telling her first. By the time the unwitting warbler logs on to check her birthday hits, under the assumption that the traditional greetings will arrive according to Chilean time, the post will already be yesterday’s news.

Smash! Pow! Whallop! That is a dastardly deed done daringly.

PGABNBP – tomorrow’s news today! Remember, you heard it here first.
Happy Birthday Hets!

All's Well in London

Intrepid explorers Karoli & Neil spent New Year's Day walking the rainy windswept streets of Central London in order to report that all is well for Papasgotabrandnewblog's travelling news agency.
The proof is in the pudding.