Feng Shui Star Turns Down Playboy Big Bucks

According to reports, world renowned Feng Shui Master Beatriz Jaramillo has turned down the opportunity of a lucrative Playboy photo shoot. Playboy boss Hugh Hefner, a regular reader of world famous blog spot Papa's got a brand new blog has been following the Feng Shui star's rise to fame and thought she would make the perfect centrefold girl.
Apparently though, the woman with the Feng Shui Midas Touch isn't in need of "real golden". A source close to the Chilean beauty said that Ms Jaramillo gave Hefner a firm but polite NO.
"Bea's body is a temple, people go there to worship" the source told us.
We have no idea what this means but we had to print something.

Hugh Hefner said he was "very disappointed", "deeply upset" and "looking forward to a good old knees up at the Playboy mansion this coming weekend to help him overcome the profound misery and depression Ms Jaramillo's rejection had caused, not only to him, but to hundred of Feng Shui fans all over the world."

Today's photograph shows our favourite Feng Shui Master in a ... ehem ... playful mood.

Special Offer: Three for the Price of One

Ladies and gentlemen (and the usual scum who read this blog!!), World famous blog spot Papa's got a brand new blog is proud to announce a special 3-4-1 birthday offer. Buy one of these "spring chickens" and we'll throw in the other two - free of charge!!

That's right. Buy a Freya and we'll throw in a Lizzie and a Fran at no extra cost.


Please remember, this is a limited offer whilst stocks last. Place your order in the comments box.

Small print:
The manager reserves the right to mix stock to meet demand. If one of the subjects is not available you may end up with 2 Frans and a Lizzie, 2 Freyas and a Fran or, if you are really unlucky 3 Lizzies!!!!!!!
No exchange, No refund.

JARAMILLO JETS IN

Ka-Ka Jaramillo, the slightly older and less successful sister of world famous Feng Shui master Beatriz Jaramillo, jetted into Santiago yesterday on a 3-week promotion tour. She is in town to promote her husband's dodgy gazpacho business whilst her hubby lives it up in Southern Spain, the Canary Islands and Italy

Our photograph shows the Jaramillo-Williams during one of their more intimate moments.

BANFI TO SUE WORLD FAMOUS BLOG SITE

Cambridge based fashion guru Pedro Banfi (pictured below) has announced his decision to sue World Famous blog spot Papa's got a brand new blog after the popular internet news site neglected to report his birthday which was on October 11th. According to Banfi, he was "overlooked in favour of lesser known celebrity Rockin Robin and some ole git who had stopped aging."
More news to follow.

British Man Confounds Doctors

A British man living in Santiago has confounded doctors by growing younger. According to reports the unnamed man is getting younger by the year and on his 46th birthday he actually became 44.
“We have been studying the subject for some time now and we can confirm reports that the man in question is actually growing younger at a rate of one day every 24 hours. His birthday is October 13th and this year instead of reaching 46 years of age as he should have done, he actually celebrated his 44th birthday for the second time.” said a spokesperson for the Medical Association of Santiago.
“We believe that this reverse-aging process is due to the large quantities of Chilean red wine that the man in question is consuming.” explained the spokesperson.
Full details of this extraordinary occurrence can be found in next month’s edition of Medical Miracles. There are unconfirmed reports that the man, who has asked for anonymity, has agreed to take part in an observation process that is being sponsored by a group of Chilean vineyards.
At great expense, world famous blog spot Papa’s got a brand new blog has acquired a computer generated photograph of what the man will look like in 2025.

What's Rockin' Robin?

According to reports just in from our correspondant in Newcastle, Robin Lloyd-Higginson:

a) had a Bird Day

b) had a Bad Day

c) had a Birthday

d) looks like Doris Day

e) wears a toupee


Due to the thick Geordie accent the editor of World famous bolg spot Papa's got a brand new blog couldn't decipher the message.

Please post a comment and set the record straight.




Question:
What do Time and Robin have in common?

Answer:
They both fly!

Happy Belated
Bird-day Robin

Tea Appeal

Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat,
Time to put some Tea in the Tea-less man’s hat

(Well, cup actually but it doesn’t rhyme with fat!!)

Yes folks, it time to dig deep and give to the needy. World famous blog spot Papa’s got a brand new blog is proud to announce it’s annual charity Tea Appeal for British tea addicts living in Chile. We will work day and night to assure that your donations get into the hands of someone who really needs them. Send Tea bags to US here in Chile care of Feng Shui Master Beatriz Jaramillo who has offered to support our cause by placing the tea in the correct place to take advantage of good energy and groovy vibes.

PROVOKE GOOD KARMA, GIVE GENEROUSLY

SPECIAL CHARITY (PG) TIP(S): Save on postage – Send next year's donation NOW!

Today’s photograph shows Chile’s dwindling tea stock. Act now and prevent rationing.

The World's a Rosy Place to Be ...........

The world's a rosy place to be, especially if your name's Rosie. Child prodigy Rosie Wells-Baker notched up two A pluses, 4 A's and a B plus in her recent exams. World famous blog spot Papa's got a brand new blog spoke to Rosie via long-distance and she told us of her success.
"I've had it all planed for years. I remember my Uncle Simon was a genius and I decided I wanted to be just like him. So, when I was younger I decided that when I went to school I'd get two A pluses, 4 A's and a B plus in my exams."

We asked Rosie what she wanted to do next and she said that she planned to visit her Uncle Simon in Chile and thank him personally for being such an inspiration.

Our photograph below shows Rosie when she was younger. Unfortunately, we're not sure if she's counting the number of exams she's going to pass, making a fox shadow-figure or wiping bogies off her finger!

What do you think? Please leave a comment (and don't forget to congratulate Rosie on her educational success).