Cruel Parents Abandon Child and Party All Night Long (well until 11pm at least!

Cruel parents Rob & Moe Baker abandoned their adolescent daughter Rosie in order to paint the town red on a joint birthday celebration on June 20th. A reporter from world famous blog spot Papa’s got a brand new blog phoned the couple who live in Oxon, Oxfordshire to interview them about their strange relationship (see below). Much to the reporter’s surprise, the phone was answered by the couple’s frightened, tearful teenage daughter Rosie who had been left home alone.
“My parents think I’m Macaulay Culkin” wailed poor Rosie “Please help me!” pleaded the distraught youngster before the line went dead.
Further attempts by the Papa’s got a brand new blog reporter to contact the teenager or her parents have proved fruitless.
The family first caught the public eye when Moe and Rob, who share the same birthday, decided to share the same profession and both became hairdressers. According to rumours they have a Jekyll and Hyde type son called Josh who has been reported as being tall and slim and short and slim on different occasions. Funnily enough, in our photo he appears to be short and fat!
Our photo shows the family in happier times when they all went out to celebrate together (and before Moe cut of all Rob’s hair in a fit of mad jealousy over his superior hairdressing skills!).
The family have just moved into a new neighbourhood where they have been reported as being “as normal and as friendly as The Adams Family.”
If you have any news about Rosie, or her weirdo parents, please contact your local RSPCA.

Broken Computer Causes Blogspot Crash

World famous blogspot Papa's got a brand new blog has been hit by technical problems and is currently offline. A spokesperson for the internationally reknowned blog made the following emotional statement:
"My computer's on the blink (sob .... sniff ... ). All being well things will be back to normal next week (sniffle .... weep .... another sob). I feel lost without it (complete breakdown to a snivielling wreck!). I can't get a beeping technician out to fix because they're all busy watching the World Cup. They'll all be well happy when they find out that Bristol based builder Geddie Piggy still has the trophy."


More Internet cafe updates will be posted soon.

End of the World Photograph Wins Prize

A photograph of the end of the world taken by an amateur photographer from Santiago, Chile has won first prize in the 2006 amateur Journalist Photography Competition.
The man, who has asked to remain anonymous, told Papa's got a brand new blog about the story behind the photograph.
"I was working in my office on a Tuesday afternoon when I happened to gaze out of the window. I saw the world was ending and I thought to myself, I'd best get a shot of this. Anyway, I rushed to get my camera and managed to get the shot just as the world ended. It was an amazing sight."
Photographic experts from around the world have heaped praise upon the amateur photographer and the quality of his work.
According to one top photographer "Photographing the end of the world is a real scoop. Of course, there is a certain amount of luck involved as you have to be in the right place at the right time. Nevertheless, the excellence of the work shines through and the image is a worthy winner of this year's prize."

Feast your eyes on this!
The images below show the scene just before the end of the world followed by the prize winning end of the world competition entry.





Congratulations Mr Amateur photographer!!

Feng Shui with Bea: The Office/Study

An office can be a cold, stark, unfriendly room if one isn't too careful. You can change all that by strategically littering a few familiar objects on your desk. It will work wonders by brightening up even the most uninviting space. In addition, this can be a splendid time saving device because you don't need to tidy up after you've finished working. Your work tools will just add to the affect and create a homely, lived-in environment. To get the best out of your yin and yan you need to get a smooth balance between large and small objects, tone and colour and useful and useless articles. The example below shows what I managed to achieve with the minimum of effort.






Log in again soon for the next installment of Feng Shui with Bea.

Beam Me Up Scotty!!

Three young lads from Chester have been chosen to star in the new Star Trek movie. The latest film, the 10th in the series, will start production in October or November. According to a spokesperson for Paramount Pictures the young boys were chosen because of their clothes and their haircuts.
"We are working with a very tight budget for this production so we had to take these things into consideration when casting the roles" the spokesperson told Papa's got a brand new blog.
"The tall, skinny one can be Spock, the small, chubby one can be Scotty and the other one with the cow lick can be Kirk."
The boys were said to be "delighted" with the news. When asked where they got their distinctive, individual style the future Captain Kirk said "We have to thank our parents for everything, our dad cuts our hair and our mum makes our clothes."



The film, entitled Star Trek Revisited should hit your screens before the end of the year.

FIFA admit World Cup Cock Up

Red-faced officials at the world football governing body FIFA were yesterday trying to play down the controversy surrounding a World Cup win by Bristol-based builder Geddie Higgie. FIFA, who awarded the trophy to the Bristol based builder in a private ceremony last week, have admitted they made a mistake and have asked for the trophy to be returned. Mr Higgie (pictured below) told reporters that he was considering his legal position and would make a decision shortly.
"I was amazed when they announced that I had won the trophy" explained the pint-sized builder. "I mean, the tournament hadn't even started and apart from that it's a team game! However, I've started getting used to being a World Cup winner and I'm quite enjoying the perks."
A spokesperson for FIFA said that the person responsible for the error was "someone who knew nothing about football" (which is obviously one of the chief requisites for getting a job at FIFA).
FIFA hope to recover the trophy before the final on July 9th or they could face the potentially embarrassing scenario of having a new champion but no trophy.
"We are appealing to Mr Higgie's better nature" said the FIFA spokesperson.
However, according to Mr Higgie's Partner, Raggsy, Mr Higgie hasn't got one!
"My Geddie ain't got no better nature" laughed Raggsy. "I should know, I have to put up with him day in, day out. Anyway, this World Cup win has really gone to his head and to tell you the truth I don't think he'll give it up without a fight. I mean he's been as happy as a pig in sh .... it is a family blog, isn't it? ... since he won it."

Bristol Based Builder Wins World Cup

Bristol based builder Geddie Higgie has won the Football World Cup. In a shock decision taken yesterday the World Football Association awarded the trophy to the 36 year old builder in a private ceremony in London's West End.
"I was quite suprised when I won" Geddie told our reporter. "I thought Brazil were going to win so, I wasn't expecting it. I hadn't prepared a speech because I didn't expect to win."
Geddie's partner Raggs also attended the ceremony.
"I was really chuffed for him I was" commented Raggsy. "He really deserves it. He's worked so hard these last few years so it's about time he got some recognition for what he does."
The couple plan to celebrate the victory with a weekend in Bournemouth at the end of July. "It'll be nice to get away from it all for a few days" said Geddie

Child seeks injunction order ........

In a milestone case, youngster Robin Higginson-Lloyd is taking legal action against her parents on the grounds of mental and emotional cruelty. The child’s legal representative issued a statement on behalf of Robin earlier this morning.
"Basically my client is fed up of the abuse she has suffered at the hands of her parents.
Having been forced to sit through two Goya's Fringe gigs in one week Robin has had enough and is seeking an injunction order to prevent her parents from forcing her to attend gigs by Goya’s Fringe at the Holy Trinity, Combe Down, Bath on the 8th and 10th of June.”

Sources close to the child say she may take further action and their have been rumors that she is applying for legal separation. Reports that Robin was stopped from boarding a plane to New Zealand at Heathrow airport yesterday have yet to be confirmed. However, a relative, who preferred to remain anonymous but who spoke with a distinctive Kiwi accent, said “Robin would be much happier here with me an Ella an mummy an daddy.”

Our photo below shows Robin fleeing from a Goya’s Fringe gig on June 3rd.

DO NOT ADJUST YOUR BLOG .......

Normal Service Will Be Resumed As Soon As Possible